fashion vs frumpy in france

ok, ok, ok...i've wasted far too much of the valuable commodity known as time in yoville, farmville & deepdarkdepressionville & am at last redirecting my energies towards something more beneficial & productive...an outlet i find exhilirating yet calming...what could it be?  sounds intriguing, right?  don't jump ahead...stay with me here...no nail biting...getting restless?  alright peeps, i won't prolong the suspense...the revelation is this:  i've finally picked up the virtual pen & am tackling the world of blogging!!!  did the news deflate your bubble?  take the wind out of your sails?  leave you with whiskey dick syndrome?  if not, let's continue...


if you're just now joining planet mo, welcome aboard!!!  you've got 38 rotations around the sun to catch up on & your first schooling in all things mo is this:  I SEVERELY DETEST THE COLD!!!  whether it be me or the weather, my statement stands.  if i agreed with the word h-a-t-e, i would go so far as to apply it towards my feelings concerning the cruelity of coldness.  thus said, i find the aforementioned 4 letter word so dirty that i refuse to utter it & fuel it's fire to pollute humanity with it's toxicity.  so, i reiterate:  I SEVERELY DETEST THE COLD!!!


i'm a beach girl.  i love the humid heat.  i love frolicking in the jacuzzi like waters of the atlantic ocean that surround the southern tip of florida (home).  i love basking in the relentless blaze of that bright glowing orb in the sky.  i love the freedom of wearing next to nothing on my skin.  and yet, i find myself in france.  in the middle of winter.  am i crazy???  clinically crazy?  perhaps a little.  crazy in love, absolutely, but that story deserves a book of blogs & will have to be put on the back burner.


it was 23° F today, which doesn't take into consideration the additional chill from that ever sneaky wind (for those of you savouring the balminess, it was so cold that it literally hurt to blink).  as i waddled about in my ill suited attire in the unforgiving cold, i looked around & found the french girls looking fashionable & fresh.  c'est n'est pas possible!!!  amazingly, they were striding about as confidently & breezily as if it were a mild spring day.  stilettos & mini shorts with tights abounded (all in black, i might add, as anything else would not be considered très chic).  pan the camera over to yours truly & roll the laugh soundtrack.  "APPLAUSE NOW!!!" looms the huge sign over my swaddled head.  i am the definition of a salvation army poster child in my donated & mismatched ensemble transported almost 5000 miles across the vast sea.  i am decked out in a knee length army green puffy coat, treasured hand knitted rainbow scarf & blue & yellow converse all stars.  surely i am impregnating the french with sheer revulsion just by mingling amongst them in my hideous frumpiness!  the only thing i have in my favor are the skinny jeans purchased abroad as a self selected birthday gift, but they do little to detract from the overall eyesore that is me!


even if euros replaced the little white flakes falling from the sky & i snatched them all up & ran (ungracefully, as the french merely glide) to purchase the latest in parisian fashion, i still don't think i could pull it off.  it's just not in my cards.  i'm not meant to infiltrate the stylish world of the clothed.  nevertheless, i will continue to wear my award winning razzle dazzle smile in an attempt to infect the galaxy with it :) :) :)  pass me my bikini please, it will make a perfect pairing...stilettos too, while you're at it ;o


so anyway, that's my story & i'm sticking to it.  i'm off to defrost my once sizzlin' but now puffy ass!!!  an abundance of thanks for stopping by & my limitless love & blessings to each of you :) :) :)  ya'll come back now, ya hear?

c'est moi...the author!!!  snow bunny, i am not!  and as much as i'd like to blend in with the french, i am also not attempting to assimilate into the heavily populated muslim community.  lastly, the only reason the camera did not capture the rudolph effect on my half mummified noggin is due to the fact that i had just exited our front door, lol ;o  BISOU!!!